A Heartbeat worthy of attention.
Posted in Mouth Flapping and Thought Absent, Awwwww Yeeeeah! February 28th, 2007; 7:06AM by Christopher

This is going to be my short and sweet review of my impressions of the Kodo performance this past Saturday. They are continuing their tour up the East Coast now and those that like music, especially the technical aspects, I do encourage you to go see them. The admission is reasonable, especially for being considered one of the world’s most engaging and extraordinary musical groups. Kodo conveys two meaning, according to them. The first is “heartbeat” (hence the title) which they say is the primal source of all rhythm. The second meaning, when read in a different way, means “children of the drum” which they say is the group’s desire to play their drums simply, with the heart of a child.

From my horrible, goofy last post, you know that a lady asked if the music was telling a story. The answer is that it is simply the song and the group leaves it to the audience to interpret the song in their own way. For this reason, I encourage those of you (as I know a handful of you apply) who will be attending one of their performances to not go further than the next paragraph. I won’t really get into my feelings for each piece, more on the technical aspects that I observed. But I would not want anything I post here to influence your minds at all to the song. I’d rather, as they desire, for you to interpret this purely from your mind.

Because I respected their wishes to not have any photography, still or video, as well as other recording, I did not take any pictures of the performance. So do not bother bringing your cameras. Also, if you are one of those that intend to buy their merchandise after the show, carry cash with you as they only accept cash or checks. Each item ranges between $15-$25…shirts and CDs are in the $20-$25 range, so plan accordingly. There is a question and answer session after the performance, which I encourage you to attend whether or not you have a question. Finally, after a standing ovation, Kodo played an additional song after their performance, which so happened to be “Zoku” which is my favorite song of theirs. If you liked the show, let them know! For those that are going to see the show, I am about to go over my thoughts on the show so I encourage you not to read past this paragraph.

In the following paragraphs, I will list the name of the piece and will include the program notes that were printed on the program, if there are any for that song. They will be in italics.

Tobira- I longed to see a world beyond this one, so I searched for the door (’Tobira”) that would take me there. Until I open the door, I have no idea what awaits me on the other side. For now I simply dream about the unknown.

This was a pretty good opening piece that set the tone for the whole concert. The general feel and energy is constant throughout. Playing the drums simply like children definitely applies. The performers were energetic and there was lots of smiles and feelings all around. The only performer that I recognized was Eiichi Saito, who is the bald person…he’s been in Kodo for a long time and he really seems to love it a whole lot. Almost every person had their own little solo performance in this show, and it seemed to loosen and lighten up the audience.

Jingi-No-Taiko- The piece finds its origin in Shimane Prefecture’s classic Ishimi Kagura piece ‘Jingi Taiko.’ The original arrangement features an ensemble consisting of a miya-daiko (traditional shrine drum), shime-daiko (rope-tightened drum), hand cymbals, and bamboo flute. The miya-daiko player would take center stage, and in the spirit of a true entertainer, he would sing and dance in addition to playing the drum. Jingi-No-Taiko is a simplified version of the original in which only the miya-daiko is played. Two drummers stand facing each other across the taiko, layering solo and base rhythms as the essence of each player is slowly revealed. This piece is offered up to the gods in prayer for a bountiful harvest, and pays homage to the cycle of life.

This piece seemed to have you characteristic “calm monk” type of atmosphere to it. The miya-daiko is a large drum, with both ends able to be struck. So it lays on its side, here on a stand with one person standing on each side of the drum. The beat is a slow to moderate speed and the drummers had a wonderfully flowing technique. Even in the slow speed, nothing seemed off. It was very well done. As noted above, one drummer would begin to sing/chant something while drumming. Off stage, several performers would seem to echo out a chorus which filled the ambient space of the auditorium and perfectly complemented the beats of the drum.

Miyake- On Miyake Island, one of the seven volcanic islands of Izu south of Tokyo, there is a festival centered on this very unique style of drumming. The drums are set very low to the ground, requiring a strenuous stance. Kodo’s arrangement of this piece features a flamboyant drumming technique and free improvisation of the performances.

This is a favorite of mine. A very simple but stong beat, combined with really good visual motions. The drums are low and requires the drummers to crouch to the ground. When doing the steady beat, they are more or less in a simple crouch. When they begin swinging, they assume what I can only really describe as an exaggerated horse stance (for you martial artists) while moving their bodies in a rocking motion towards and away from the drum, as there is a foot near the drum and a foot away. The sychronized motions of the performers during this rocking motion is really impressive, and makes my legs sore just watching them!

Momotsuzuri- “Momotsuzuri” refers to a patchwork style of making quilts. It can be likened to the creation of music by weaving one sound with another, or to the creation of the universe through the connection of all life forms. In composing this piece, my image of the O-Daiko was that of a womb from which all living things are conceived.

This was really cool. A shallow O-Daiko is center stage and the two female drummers walk slowly to the center, from either side of the stage, arms outstretched displaying their sticks. This immediately reminded me of the anime show Noir (see the picture of “Two maidens who govern death”). Their drum sticks were unusual, looking like broom handles roughly three to four feet in length, with some puffed fabric on one end. Both stood just in front and to either side of the O-Daiko. Throughout the piece, both women exhibited graceful and intricate motions as they struck the taiko, creating different sounds with either the soft or hard end of their stick in a regimented, yet smooth, form. At almost a majority of the piece, both also did a song as well…which is a little hard for me to do the same. My “singing” while marching during the 1995 state marching performances don’t even compare.

Monochrome- Weaving constant rhythmic patterns together with highly irregular ones, Monochrome develops spirally to an exciting climax. The listener might interpret the sounds as those of the changing of the seasons, or perhaps even the progression of life itself. The ambitious pace expands greatly the range and power of expression of the roped shime-daiko.

This has to be the most complex music I’ve ever come across. I wouldn’t even know where to begin if I had to put this on paper. The interpretations presented above were not my interpretations. A lot of my interpretations for anything Kodo does usually involves larger “invisible” forms, such as energy as a body and flowing and spirit. You will not see me do things that are conceivable to a generality, like the seasons or even snapshots of life. For such a good song, there is a high degree of unstableness with the sounds that are generated. While the rhythm is the same for each individual drummer, they are introduced in their own accord, with no unity. Contrasting this haphazard like nature is the extraordinary amount of precision and discipline displayed by each individual. The piece almost seemed to detail the combination of individual freedom vs community as well as the human spirit with its flaws. You are probably noting that this is probably the first time you see an interpretation from me, I do so because while I am usually along the same lines as the notes of the songs…I wanted to share my vision of the song, which is not like the suggestions above. After various strong, even furious, attempts to stand out, the individual beats will return to their low simmer. A slow and steady, yet soft, gong is introduced and from that deep and steady tone the individual sounds began to build, but this time in unison. The gong gets louder and slowly increases speed, but more so in volume than in speed…to the point where it is as chaotic as the Shime-daiko when they were individual. Then, one by one, the steady and strong beat of the Chu-daiko are introduced, with which the Shime-daiko match beats with. Together in unison, they build up the energy of this song perfectly. For a contemporary, even abstract piece, I love this song a lot! May I also note that despite their small size, the drummers were able to bring the Shime-daikos to a volume that was just a notch below uncomfortable, which I really liked. This reinforced my impressions that these guys seem to just want to play till they drop, and the energy they generate and release is more than enough evidence of that.

P.P.C.- There are no notes for this piece. This is basically the comic relief, that I called the “Three Stooges.” Three players, each wearing a color of red, green and blue, come on stage in a silent comedy while each holding an instrument. Whether a cymbal or a small drum. During this time, the rest of the performers are setting up for the next piece. There is humored contrast with the goofiness displayed by the Three Stooges as they play around with the rest of the performers that are setting up the drums, whose expressions are stoic, serious and almost fervent. Finally, the drum pieces are set up and the four main players wait as the Three Stooges pass in front of them before leaping forward with a strong flurry on their drums, scaring off the Three Stooges and signaling the start of the next song.

Chonlima- “Chonlima” features four drummers playing Okedo-daiko (barrel drums) and Shime-daiko (roped drums), and one drumer on a larger Miya-daiko. The players pass the sounds from one to another, palying at a frenetic speed, mixing traditional Japanese rhythms with more modern tempos, blending tense excitement with subtle humor. The title “Chonlima-One Thousand League Horse” alludes to a stallion that possessed great speed and stamina in a well-known Korean legend.

This piece is Christine’s favorite, and I can easily see why…especially since she’s a former marching band drummer. Their hard work pays off here. Each drummer has a Shime-daiko in front of them, surrounding each Shime-daiko is an Okedo-daiko, meaning there are five of them total. Behind them is the drummer with the Miya-daiko. This has a detached resemblance to a drumline in marching band…not really, but use your imagination enough. As noted, the piece is very fast and the seamless transition of the hurried beat flowing from one player to another is very impressive. Adding to this is Kodo’s typical discipline in form, where the angles and heights of the drum sticks, the stances of the drummers and the angles of their posture at any given time are closely matched that give them, especially in this song, an almost robotic feel to them…kind of a look that you would find in a serious scene of Animusic.

Ajara- In Japanese, “Ajara” means to romp, frolic and ‘play the fool,’ but the character used to write this word also holds the nuance of being fashionable and elegant. I will play the fool with all of my might, but in a style suitable for the word “Ajara.”

This piece is preceded by the appearance of the Three Stooges again. In where they find a large taiko (I want to see it is a shallow O-daiko). They wheel it across the stage and each Stooge takes a turn playing a beat on the drum. Other drummers come out and wheel three more taikos, a little smaller I think, until they surround the first taiko in a triangular formation. Each Stooge takes to a drum and begins playing, forming a unified beat, though also showcasing a solo each while alternatively beating on the center taiko, and usually hopping around, trading off with the outer taikos. While still being a little comical, their goofiness is offset by some impressive drumming skill, both in beat and in form.

Mine-No-Kaze- This piece is based on a folk song from Ehime Prefecture called the “Misaka Magouta.” To create this arrangement, the performers actually went to visit Misaka Ridge. As they contemplated the depth of the magnificent mountain’s natural splendor, they tried to conjure images of the horsemen of days bygone. The wind blowing across the mountain peak, the rising moon, the sound of the horse’s bell… using the Shamisen, Kokyu (Chinese fiddle), bamboo flute, and song, the performers aimed to weave these images into an intimate musical tapestry.

Oh yeah, I feel bad. This was the most atypical Kodo piece, by some standards. Mainly, because of the lack of a percussion beat. As noted, a fiddle and flute, mainly, were used in this piece. One of the female drummers sang the vocals for this piece, and it was very graceful. I don’t think I can build upon the notes above. During this time, four drummers began setting up the “float” that held their large O-daiko, rotating it so that one of the drumming surfaces faced towards the crowd and then locking the wheels in place. Why do I feel bad? Because they lady finished her song and she did really well. I wanted to clap, as I could imagine the audience wanted to as well. However, when she was done singing and left the stage, the Kokyu and flute continued to play, stepping off the stage and playing while moving across the main floor. During this time, they continued setting up for the next song, placing two Shime-daiko on the O-daiko float, three Chu-daiko, facing sideways, to the front of the stage lined abreast. The center and right Chu-daikos had Shime-daikos placed just in front of it. Eventually, with the setting up complete, the fiddle and flute stopped playing and for a short bit, the auditorium was silent.

O-Daiko- The story is told of a baby who upon hearing the thunderous sound of the O-daiko dropped off into a peaceful slumber. The powerful sounds emanating from the O-daiko possess a deep tranquility. The arrangement is simple. The drummer on one side beats out a basic rhythm while the main drummer inprovises freely. When they become united with each other and the rhythm, both the drummers and the listeners find themselves wrapped within the embrace of the O-daiko. This miya-daiko, carved from a single tree, measures about 4 feet across and weighs about 800 pounds.

This is another favorite of mine. I am impressed by the effort that the drummers put into playing this piece. They are really beating on this thing as if their lives depended on it. I remember in Dahlgren we had a joke about working out, where you feel you can’t do any more reps and your personal trainer levels a gun to your head and says, “One more!” and you just moan away, as adrenaline in your body makes you start lifting away as if you just started working out. That’s what I see here in this piece. I had seen this on a DVD of a previous performance they had done before and I could just imagine how exhausting it must be. Seeing it live, I was astonished not only by seeing it all in person, but while te DVD cut out most parts to make the piece seem like it was a minute long, I am almost sure that the two drummers had been wailing away at the O-daiko for at least fifteen minutes, maybe even more. I can’t say they did it less than ten minutes. They had easily worked up a sweat and despite being incredibly fit, they were still heaving by the time they were done. It was during this time I realized that they were doing three performances in Dallas, it was amazing to think they just played their heart out, it seems, the day before and were going to do it again the following day. This is also where the drummers are wearing nothing more than a headband and some toweled g-string, which of course drew varied hushed responses from some in the audience. That helps bring out the raw, strong nature of this piece out. The main drummer faces the drum, his back towards the audience. Before striking the drum, he loads back his body, flexing his back like a bodybuilder in a competition, then he quickly assumes a lowered, wide-stepped stance and uses his entire body to beat the drums, every now and then stomping his feet at the base of the float to add to the rhythm. Unlike the normal disciplined precision displayed on the other pieces, this one is raw and full of energy. But it is still impressive that they are able to finish with a final unified beat in the end, despite being understandably exhausted. If I could ever go at it on the O-daiko for that long, I wouldn’t have to worry about any other workout for the rest of my life!

Yatai-Bayashi- Every year on December 3rd in Saitama Prefecture, an all-night festival is held featuring richly decorated two story yatai (carts) pulled from village to village. The people hauling the yatai are urged on by the powerful beating of the taiko, concealed in the cramped first story of the carts. This gave rise to a technique of drumming while seated. Turning the two-ton fixed axle carts at intersections requires complex team work, and is accompanied by precise and intricate tama-ire solos on the shime daiko.

This song just slightly breaks a tie with “O-daiko” as my favorite piece by Kodo. Remaining with the setup of the O-daiko, the two drummers that just played just on the verge of falling into a coma get off the float and proceed do the left and center Chu-daikos to play the next piece (which I couldn’t believe they had any energy left to play). Five more drummers appear. One proceeds to the final Chu-daiko on the right, two board the float and setup up facing the audience with the Shime-daikos that were placed on there beforehand. One comes out with what I can only describe as a Japanese triangle…just not triangle shaped. The last has a bamboo flute. The two who had played just before get a short rest as the rightmost Chu-daiko starts off with a beat and, joining in with the Shime-daikos, begins playing a solo while accompanied with the triangle and flute. The flute plays a solo as well, complementing the Chu-daiko while the triangle and Shime-daikos keep a steady beat throughout. Once the solo wraps up, the middle Chu-daiko preps for his turn and both Chu-daikos match beats with the Shime-daikos as they middle Chu-daiko takes over and the right Chu-daiko fades silently. It should be noted, that the center drummer’s face gets uncomfortably red, red enough that if this was a Silent Hill movie, then he would be sprinkling blood all over the place before his head explodes. The center repeats the same solo and then the transitions continues as the left takes over from the center. As the left Chu-daiko finishes his solo, the center and right swivel around to face the audience and they do a duet with their Shime daikos. Afterwards, the right drummer continues a solo on the Shime-daiko as the center returns to the Chu-daiko. Then, all players join in concert, combining all beats together for a short bit. Then the Shime-daikos on the float lower their volume greatly, while maintaining temp and form (which I’m told is impressive) before building up again, and the other drummers return for a final beat before the song concludes. I find those playing the Chu-daiko in the reclined sitting position to be very impressive, as I know I’d be in pain trying to do the same. It allows for a display of precision and form while still also allowing raw energy to be shown in this position…that and the deep and strong beats from the Chu-daiko seem to appeal to me the most.

After the show, they received a standing ovation by the audience and the Three Stooges returned to try to get the audience to match the beats they played. All the while, various taikos, though predominantly Okedo-daikos, are brought out on the stage. Before long, the drummers come out and they start playing my favorite song…Zoku!

This song seems to calm and rejuvenate my Warrior spirit, and is a song I can easily listen to over and over again. Taiko drumming has been used in medieval Japan to motivate the troops, and I can see that. The combination of almost all types of taikos being used, with the main beats coming from the Okedo-daikos and Miya-daikos, the deep slow beat of the shallow O-daiko, a solo performed on mutliple taikos and near the end, the joining of the Chu-daikos to beat a deep and constant rhythm, it was the perfect way to wrap up my first concert with Kodo.

The combination of discipline and precision, mated to the contrast of the primal and raw…as well as the hushed quiet where you had to strain to hear the beats (in perfect precision still) all the way to a volume and energy so loud you expect your chair to come off the floor and the lights to fall from the ceiling. There are many performances where you can enjoy the show by throwing a disc in your DVD player or uploading the song to your MP3 player. Kodo is not in that category. I have avidly listened to two of their CDs and have seen their DVD many times, and that does nothing for seeing them live and in person. I am also one that is a little of a stickler when it comes to home theater and while I don’t have the best setup, my setup is more than sufficient and I still did not get the experience I did on Saturday night. The performance was so good, I decided I would not listen to my CDs again, I still haven’t removed the wrapping from their newest CD that I bought. Until I can get a player and a set of headphones that are pretty much the best that I can get my hands on and can reproduce the sound exactly the way Kodo wanted it to sound like when recording, I refuse to listen to their beats through an inferior medium.

When I am caught sitting in an uncomfortable posture, yet the music is demanding my attention that I do not even do something like shift in my seat to get uncomfortable, then I have a group that gives a performance that has earned my absolute and unwavering attention. This was money well-spent and worth every penny. I could’ve paid three times the amount and still have been happy.

Their One Earth Tour is a success, despite entering their 26th year, they are in high demand all over the world. Don’t let the traditional garb and the ancient looking wooden drums fool you. If they happen to be near you and you can see them, go. Listen, NOW!

One Earth Tour- Our small planet is filled with a huge variety of people from different cultures who often have very different ways of living. In this world, it is more important than ever that people find ways to live together harmoniously. In ancient Japan the taiko was a symbol of the rural community and it is said that the limits of the village were defined not by geography but by the furthest distance at which the taiko could be heard. It is Kodo’s hope with the One Earth Tour to bring the sound of the taiko to people around the globe, so that we may all be reminded of our membership in that much larger community: the world.

The Longest Day of My Life This Year!
Posted in Mouth Flapping and Thought Absent, Itadakimasu!, ADD/OCD, Out of Nowheres, R200 Club, Awwwww Yeeeeah! February 25th, 2007; 10:16PM by Christopher

So yesterday, I got to see Christine as she had come to the metroplex in a school function, or some organizational function. In addition to this, she had her birthday present from me coming that night. Kodo, probably the most famous taiko drum group as well as one of the most revered musical groups in the world, has done a three day event in Dallas, as part of their One Earth Tour as they perform in various locations here in the US and Canada for the start of this year. As you probably know, there is no real boredom hanging around with us and all of Saturday was a giant “24″ story just waiting to be told. But I also want to give my thoughts on the Kodo performance. I almost don’t even want to call them “drummers” because that would group them with all the other drummers out there, and their performance last night was amazing to me. I have two CDs and Christine has a DVD that I had watched beforehand, but…like many say in other reviews…there was nothing to prepare me for watching them live last night. Ah well, they usually say “save the best for last”…so I guess it’s on to the mindless “24″ story!

Previously on “10″…
Chris: “So you’ll be coming to Dallas on this retreat?”
Christine: “Yeah.”
*next scene at work*
Chris: “Good news, Wayne! The schedule’s quicker than I thought, I’ll be getting my pistol by Friday!”
Wayne: “That’s great, then you can show it to Christine!”
*next scene at Wal-Mart*
Chris: “I haven’t tried these before…” *grabs a bag of Natural Blue Corn Tostitos*
*next scene at work*
Chris: *peering out the door* “It’s four already! Where’s FedEx?”
*FedEx guy enters at 4:10*
Wayne: “He’s been waiting for this all day! Hey Chris, looks like you’ll get to show Christine your pistol!”
Chris: *pulling away the bubble wrap* “Oh wow, this is beautiful!”
Wayne: “Looks like you have a winner!”
FedEx: “I-I just delivered you a gun?!?”

The following takes place between 2PM and 3PM…
events don’t occur in real time!
>02:14 PM
*driving on I-635 north*
Chris: “So we’re going to meet at Cheddar’s?”
Christine: “Yeah.”
Chris: “See you then!” *hangs up and looks at the sky* “Whoa…the sky’s getting red!”
>02:40 PM
Christine: “Chick-Fil-A!”
Chris: “Okay…” *looks up at the ever reddening sky*

The following takes place between 3PM and 4PM…
events don’t occur in real time!
>03:10 PM
Chris: “Well, we’d better get going if we’re gonna see Chip.”
*a few minutes later, driving back up to Grapevine Mills…Christine checks out the pistol and both look at the hazy red as they enter the highway*
Chris and Christine: “Whooooaaa…” *doot deet doot deet*

>03:43 PM
*inside the food court*
Chris: “Okay, Christine. Use your tall height to your advantage and help me find Chip and Dylan.”
Christine: *about ten seconds later* “There they are!”
Chris: “Oh…”
>03:58 PM
*after talking with Chip and Dylan, Chris and Christine head off and enter Gameworks to play Let’s Go Jungle*
Chris: “Looks like someone’s already playing…”
*suspenseful music plays as frame shrinks, joined by a frame of Chip and Dylan walking towards Gameworks, another frame showing the man and daughter playing Let’s Go Jungle, and another frame of an airline pilot trying to land his plane in the red sky*
Christine: *after watching the daughter squeal at the sight of every single monster and shooting wildly left and right* “If I had a teammate like her, I would’ve punched her already!”
*doot deet doot deet*

The following takes place between 4PM and 5PM…
event’s don’t occur in real time!
>04:05 PM
*deciding there’s not enough time to play, it’s time to move on to the next game*
Christine: *while repeatedly pressing a single button to a song about ABCs* “…”
Chris: “Well, we’ve gotta go now.”
>04:24 PM
*driving down the main road to Keller, Chris just passes a large construction truck*
Chris: “They just closed off all but one lane to a road!” *begins to take detour, then notices a construction man tell him to stop and starts removing cones* “Hey, looks like they’re finishing up!”
*cones are removed and they begin driving straight, only to see another police car blocking the road*
Chris: *turns off into a parking lot* “Okay, this is getting ridiculous! We’re just going to go around…” *turning further into a parking lot, they see a large trash can just parked in the middle of the parking lot, blocking his way* “Okay, this is starting to become the longest day of my life this year!” *finally back on the road* “I don’t like wasting any time…even though we’re in a standstill.”
>04:54 PM
*after creeping through miles and miles of blocked traffic, they finally arrive…very late…to the retreat house*
Chris: *after Christine steps inside the house* “Yeah…I think I’m just going to wait out here.”
Christine: “Well, it’s gonna take a while.”
Chris: *holds up his watch to show Christine* “We don’t have a while!”
*Chris steps back out in the driveway of the house and notes that the sky is returning to normal and the sun is getting bright, he heads back to get his sunglasses*
Rachel (only realizes this when Christine says it was her later on): *walking over to Chris* “Christine’s up taking a shower and is going to be a while. You can come inside. I already talked with the group leader and she says it’s okay, just had to get everyone dressed.”
*suspenseful music plays as frame shrinks, joined by another frame of a car driving past in an adjoining road, another frame showing the sun began to shine brighter, and another frame of the shadows from a nearby tree get darker*
Chris: “Uh…okay.” *camera follows Chris and Rachel as they head back to the house, the door closes behind them*
*doot deet doot deet*

The following takes place between 5PM and 6PM…
events don’t occur in real time!
>05:03 PM
*Rachel introduces Chris to various other people in the group, then…*
Chris: “figuring it best to be as unobtrusive as possible and let them continue whatever they were doing* “I’m just going to hang out over here.” *heads back over towards the door and stands over there, observing anything from pictures hanging in the wall, motivational messages taped to the wall and skiing gear on the second floor hallway*
>05:17 PM
*Christine finally comes down and they both head out quickly*
>05:26 PM
*Chris takes a bet and peels out from the typical direction after spotting fast moving cars and enters highway 114*
>05:32 PM
*Chris enters the George Bush Turnpike*

The following takes place between 05:35:06 PM and 05:35:07 PM…
*Chris hands a dollar to the man in the toll booth*
*doot deet doot deet*

The following takes place between 05:39:48 PM and 05:39:49 PM…
*Chris hands a dollar to the man in the toll booth*
*doot deet doot deet*

The following takes place between 05:42:34 PM and 05:42:37 PM…
*lacking the right change, Chris tosses fifty cents into a forty cent toll basket…you get two extra seconds to hear Chris mutter disgust on being ripped off*
*doot deet doot deet*

The following takes place between 6PM and 7PM…
events don’t occur in real time!
>06:13 PM
*weaving past slow traffic*
Chris: “C’mon people, don’t be driving slow! No red lights…a green light is a happy light!”
Christine: “…wha…”
>06:16 PM
*after spotting a sign for I-635*
Chris: “What? 635? Don’t tell me I passed the pizza place!” *does a CTU-approved U-turn* “Help me read the road signs, I’ll recognize it when I hear it!”
>06:18 PM
*in keeping true to the fact that there are obstacles in Chris’ path, Chris comes up to an accident with two vehicles in the lane he’s on and he has to go around them*
>06:25 PM
Chris: *squinting* “What does that sign say?”
Christine: “Frankfor…”
Chris: “That’s it!” *does yet another CTU-approved right turn and enters the area…only to find empty windows* “Whaaa…”
Christine: “I don’t think they’re here anymore.”
*Chris’ cell phone rings*
Chip: “Did you call?”
Chris: “Yeah, I was seeing if you remembered the road it was on…but we found it already…and they’re not here anymore!”
Chip: “You mean, Brenda Vaughn is gone?”
Chris: “…yes.”
*tragic song plays as frame shrinks, a frame of someone doing an emo hair roll and another frame of some guy facing away from the camera with a white streak in the middle of his hair*
*clock ticks away silently as this hour prematurely ends in memory of the Brenda Vaughn picture…*

The following takes place between 7PM and 8PM…
event’s don’t occur in real time!
>07:09 PM
*camera focuses at the sign of Backyard Burger, then pans down to show Christine and Chris leaving the restaurant and out the parking lot*
>07:25 PM
*inside SMU campus, following a long line of cars*
Christine: *after watching a car pass the auditorium stop and an old man gets out* “First he didn’t want to walk, now he wants to walk!”
Chris: *coming up to a stop sign and seeing other cars in a perpindicular road come up, but they’re blocked by pedestrians crossing the street* “Yes! You can’t go anywhere, muhahahaha!”
>07:34 PM
*after singing in the elevator to see if the carpeting on the walls would absorb the sound, the doors open and Chris and Christine step on to the second floor*
Chris: “This looks like an aerobics floor!”
*a bell sounds and the auditorium doors open*
>07:37 PM
*Chris and Christine sit in their seats*
Chris: “These seats…are kind of small!”
Christine: “Yeah, they’re starting to feel kinda small even for me!”
>07:58 PM
Chris: “Well, it’s about to start soon.”
*in the row in front of them, some men sit down and one guy directly in front of Christine starts fanning himself*
Christine: *after inhaling whatever organic particles the guy was blowing off of him and into her nose* “*gag!*”
*suspenseful music as the frame shrinks, showing Christine gagging, the other frame showing the guy fanning himself, another frame showing Gameworks and two other people sitting to start playing Let’s Go Jungle, and another frame showing the red cloudy air over Louisiana…but not really, since the sun is already down*
Chris: *hands Christine the program* “Here, this should help you breathe.”
Christine: *grabs program, and begins fanning the back of the guy’s head*
*doot deet doot deet*

*We now jump to 10 PM…more details of the Kodo performance coming up, away from this pathetic post*

The following takes place between 10PM and 11PM…
events don’t occur in real time!
>10:07 PM
*Chris and Christine walk downstairs and head back into the auditorium as a brief Q&A session with the senior Kodo performer is underway*
>10:15 PM
Random man asking question: “Which songs are like traditional Japanese songs?”
Chris: *imitating Kodo performer* “Uh…duh, we’re Japanese, stupid!”
>10:26 PM
Random lady asking question: “Does your music tell a story, like of the culture and traditions, or martial arts?”
Chris: *imitating Kodo performer* “Martial arts? What racist profiling are you up to? My music tells a story that says, ‘Once upon a time, shut up and just listen to my music!’”
>10:33 PM
*The Q&A ends and Chris and Christine make a beeline for the merchandise table*
Chris: “Do they take credit cards?”
Christine: “Looking and finding a sign* “Cash or checks only.”
Chris: *looks around, then heads over to a police officer standing near the entryway* “Excuse me, ma’am, where’s the nearest ATM?”
Police officer: “It’s across the street on Hillcrest, to the left at a 7-11, but it’s kind of a walk from here.”
Chris: “Thank you” *heroic music plays as Chris descends the steps and moves quickly…only to have full force winds stop him almost cold”
>10:42 PM
*Chris enters the 7-11 and walks to the ATM when his cellphone goes off*
Chris: “This is Bauer! Hello?”
Christine: “You’d better hurry, everyone just started leaving!”
Chris: “I’m just pulling out the money right now”
*heroic music replaced by Kodo music as Chris runs back towards the auditorium*
>10:46 PM
*Chris runs up to the merchandise table and starts looking at things to buy*
Japanese man: “How about this shirt in white?” *points to shirt across the table* “It’s made from organic cotton!”
Chris: *looking at details of organic shirt* “So large is the biggest size? How about extra large?”
Japanese man: “No, we only have large.” *opens an organic shirt to see if it will fit Christopher* “Yeah, extra large will fit you better.”
Chris: *looking at a freshly opened organic shirt makes Christopher hungry, but decides not to eat it* “So I guess I’ll have to get the fake cotton shirt!”
*Chris buys shirts for both him and Christine, as well as their newest CD*
Japanese man: “Thank you, and thanks for running all the way back up here.”
Chris: *thinking running wasn’t so bad, compared to a half-naked Japanese guy wailing away at a giant drum for what seemed like fifteen minutes nonstop* “No problem!”
>10:57 PM
*walking to parking lot, Christine gets on her phone*
Christine: “Where should we meet Charles?”
Chris: “How about the McDonalds on Greenville.”
*suspenseful music as the frame shrinks, another frame shows Charles on his phone, the other frame shows a worker in that McDonalds cooking chicken nuggets and another frame shows the Japanese man eating an organic shirt*
Christine: *finishes the phone call and sees an observatory shaped object at the edge of the parking lot* “Hey look, it’s a missile silo!”
*doot deet doot deet*

The following takes place between 11PM and 12AM…
events don’t occur in real time!
>11:13 PM
*Christine says bye to Charles and then Chris sets off to head back to Keller*
Chris: *taking a slight detour* “Oh yeah, let’s see if we can see the Tundra.”
>11:25 PM
*thanks to the lack of user friendliness of the highway 114/121 area, Chris takes a wrong turn but eventually makes it to the Toyota dealership…notices the gate is open and drives in, showing Christine the new trucks*
>11:32 PM
*Business Highway 114, picks itself off the ground and is doing the Splinter Cell evade as Chris tries to find that road*
>11:44 PM
*Chris finally does a major backtrack and almost starts from scratch, when he notices a sign for Keller and makes the exit*
>11:52 PM
*After a little bit of driving, they are back on the road to Keller*
Chris: “So which direction should I be going?”
Christine: “Uh, I believe that way.”
*Chris makes turn*
Chris: “Finally, we’re done.”
Christine: “Wow, this does seem like the longest day of my life!”
Chris: “I know, this day was ridiculous!”
Christine: “That would’ve been crazy if we went the wrong way and we had to turn around!”
Chris: “Oh boy, I don’t know what I’d say about that!”
>11:58 PM
Christine: “It’s almost midnight! I told Rachel I’d be there by midnight.”
Chris: “Yeah, that’s not going to happen.” *comes up to an intersection and notices a building under construction up ahead* “That’s a strange looking building.”
Christine: “Uh…oh no! That building! We’re going the wrong way…we’re heading back to Grapevine!”
*suspenseful music as frame shrinks, followed by a frame of a camera panning around the building, another frame of a different camera panning around that building and another frame of a camera panning around the parked Tundras*
Chris: “Well, this IS the longest day of my life this year!” *Chris pulls yet another CTU-approved U-turn and heads back the other way as Chris looks at his watch as all clock hands line up…*
Chris and Christine: “Doot deet doot deet!”

Not like her head could get any lighter…
Posted in 1+1=2, My head's gonna EXPLODE! February 19th, 2007; 7:47AM by Christopher

Stupid…stupid…stupid…

Fruit of sin!
Posted in Out of Nowheres, R200 Club, 1+1=2 February 18th, 2007; 8:36AM by Christopher

Okay, this is an inside joke…the title, that is. So you probably won’t get it…but maybe you will. During my commute to and from work, I almost always have to pass downtown. I’ve done it for about two and a half years now. I have seen the city in various times, weather and angles. I figured I should slowly prepare to get some pictures taken of Dallas. Not usually the easiest of things. First off, I still have my simple Sony as my camera. Of course, the way I mention it doesn’t do it justice…it has done an excellent job for me as far as taking pictures…but I have found myself now often surpassing its technical limits. The camera that I am eyeing isn’t out yet, and since it is brand new it will require that I don’t touch it until I am sure (through the risks taken by others and the commentary they share) that it is safe for me to lay down the money.

I decided to begin scouting some locations and doing some test shots. This poses an interesting challenge. The shots I want to try out are dawn/sunrise shots. These are a challenge for my camera and myself because of the constant and ever rising sun. Those that aren’t really sure can see the pictures that I did just before dawn of the Oklahoma City Memorial back in December. I have a very small window of time to compose and take the shots that I desire.

To obtain the shots that I want means I will be loitering in the arc west to southwest of the downtown Dallas outskirts, along the Trinity River area. Let’s just say that isn’t your warm and friendly neighborhood. I know, my work is around that area and you’ve got to be careful, even in broad daylight sometimes. I still remember three gangster looking guys in a car that cut me off during a lunch break and wanted to intimidate me by flashing a revolver at me through their window. Of course, I am not the one to be intimidated easily and I let their faces grow in shock with my response…but we’ll leave it at that! Don’t worry, nothing bad happened!

That alone complicates things. To ensure my well being, I have to plot out things and almost do a small scale version of the planning of an itinerary that the Secret Service have to do when they case out a location that the President will be visiting. So I have to check communications, weather and I have to be loaded out and prepared for the worst case scenario, which is a dire situation for me if that unfolds. But I had some factors to my advantage. It would be dawn and hopefully that time frame would keep my interactions with others almost nonexistent. Also, the temperatures are in the 30s, which hopefully will convince most everyone to stay home and in their warm beds.

So out I go and I case a variety of locations. This is also one of the first times that I’m going through and the sky is almost clear. With rush hour traffic eliminated for the weekend, I discover some new angles I want to try as well. Suffice to say, everything went very smoothly and without incident.

After sorting myself out for the rest of the day, I went to get my hair cut. It was a lot busier than the past times I’ve gone, but there was a lady who was getting ready for a wedding. What a pretty day to have a wedding, hopefully the wind would stay tame for the occasion.

At the last minute, I heard of a Chinese New Year festival to take place in downtown and I figured I’d squeeze the final events of the festival into my schedule. Some coworkers wanted to know if I was going to go to the Big Town gun show this weekend, that’s still up in the air for me.

With that, I went to upgrade my MT2 RX-8 and meet up with Chip and Dylan. But today, they were on Filipino Time so I only got to grab a quick bite to eat before I had to head off. However, today I noticed someone racing with a Gemballa. This particular Porsche model is not available on the US machines, only the Japanese. Though anyone that has the card can still play it on a US machine. I didn’t really care anyways. Furthermore, the person owning the card couldn’t race, let alone drive, the car. I was also confused on the gender identity of this person. I honestly could not tell whether the person was male or female. Even on the cell phone, the voice could not hint me either way. Scary, huh? Chip later SMS’d me that the person returned and even Chip couldn’t figure it out!

So I made it back to downtown for the Chinese festival, except for one problem…I didn’t have my camera with me! Ugh, can I just stand in the middle of the road for someone to run me over, please! But it was a lot of fun, it was the first time I have ever seen them do the whole dragon parade thing in person…as far as I know.

With that, my mind was telling me I needed to go to Northpark Mall for a reason…but I didn’t know what. I figured I’d just head over there and it’ll come back to me. As I walked around, circumnavigating the mall I was fairly disappointed that I couldn’t figure out what I wanted in there. I passed over to the Apple store and decided to poke my head in there, if for nothing but to put useless nonsense on the Widgets that were built in to the computers. This time, I went deeper in the store and found an accessory that I felt I needed for my computer for audio recording. I couldn’t believe it, I was buying something from the Apple Store! *shivers* The checkout counter was trying to show how shnazzy they were, using this giant PDA wireless device with keypad, display and a barcode scanner. They even ran my credit card through it. But it was clumsy looking, they should make iScan for their stores! I got this drawstring plastic bag as my shopping bag and I made my way out.

As I headed up towards the Nordstrom area I got an amusing view. A couple of months ago, on the first floor corner in front of Nordstrom, the mall got this odd art sculpture thing which is surrounded by rows of tennis ball sized round cactus. Ever since that thing went up, I’ve amused myself by how humans seem to cheat the “Only the strong survive” method of nature’s way of improving the ecosystem. I’ve watched kids repeatedly poke a cactus to only be repeatedly stabbed by one. Yes, you dumb kids, you will get pricked by a cactus if you push on it!

Well, I watched a bunch of kids being filmed on camcorder by their dad. I guess he didn’t have a wide enough angle so he began backing up. Yes, my friends, he backed up right into that cactus emo sculpture looking thing. His lower back hit the base and he lifted himself up on the cactus, complete with face of shocked bewilderment and flailing arms (and miraculously, he kept a firm hold on the camcorder this entire time!). He knocked a couple of the prickly plants off their rows and had a few needles on the back of his shirt. He used his hand to realign the cactus, only to be stabbed several times. Then he brushed of his shirt, repeatedly bringing his hand back as he got stabbed.

THEN, his kids rushed up and started poking at the cactus and getting their fingers stabbed. Oh my, we HAVE a winner! Even though I didn’t have my camera, a camera wouldn’t have done this justice. It had to be a camcorder catching this lunacy.

So yes! Amusement! Anyways, the sun is looking very nice this Sunday morning. There’s supposed to be another Chinese New Year event today so I’ll probably go check that out. There’s also a photography exhibit at Richardson library, so you anti-Christopher assassins can go head of and wait for me there if you want. I’m told today is the Chinese New Year, so in that case if it’s true, Happy Chinese New Year!

I might as well have used chopsticks!
Posted in Out of Nowheres, R200 Club, Awwwww Yeeeeah! February 15th, 2007; 8:00AM by Christopher

Before I begin, nothing says Valentines to me like getting my order of Girl Scout cookies! Yes! Yeah, I don’t particularly care for yesterday, it’s a nice thing to do…but only if you do the right thing, not just the mindless things all these businesses market to you.

So after work yesterday, I had to go somewhere and I decided that I didn’t have enough time to sit and eat and I’d go through the drive thru of Chick-Fil-A. The one I went to had nobody waiting, so I wasn’t worried about a line. When I went to Allen, the other week, their Chick-Fil-A was more congested than the taxiways of O’Hare, La Guardia and D/FW airports combined! I ordered a simple meal, nothing to complicated to *gasp* eat while driving. Yes, it’s unsafe, but other than being maybe 2 mph slower, it doesn’t affect my driving and reaction time, I’ve worked it into an art! Of course me, the king of eating food by some! As I head up to the pick up window, I realize I have a coupon for a free Ice Dream that I got last week when I was in the Chick-Fil-A in Allen. Man, I really need to tell you about that…oh well. So I get to the window and before I can say anything, this kid is peering out at me and he says, “Give me your Bluetooth headset!”
“…no.”
“Why not?”
“Because it’s mine…”

He eventually left and there was another guy there and I asked if he would redeem my Ice Dream coupon and said he would. He asked if I wanted it in a bowl or a cone. Without thinking, I figured since dessert is eaten last I’d put it in a bowl. It wasn’t until I drove off I realized that I was going to need to eat it first, thus I was better off with a cone. But that’s where the fun begins. So he hands my little bowl (if you can call it that) of ice cream along with the rest of my order. I asked for my spoon and he says he already put it in the bag. With that, I drove off and got back on the road to head back up 75 Central.

After waiting at a brief traffic light, I dug into the bag to feel for my plastic spoon. I felt it and pulled out a knife. Okay, I don’t need a knife as I set that aside and dug around wondering what the knife was for anyway, since I had a sandwich and fries. After a little bit more digging, I still had not come up with my spoon. At a red light, I stuck my face in the bag. Nothing. He put a knife in my bag! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO EAT AN ICE CREAM WITH A KNIFE?!?

So on to the highway we go and I try just eating the ice cream like Jaws, which works like eating a hamburger with a straw…well, okay easier…but you know what I mean! My mind switches to Military Mode as I start looking for improvised utensils. After carefully considering my steering wheel, the boot on my right foot and my wallet, I decide I have nothing around me that can be used as a spoon. Alright! You want me to play your game? I’LL play your game! With that, I broke out the knife and began eating the ice cream with the knife. The ice cream was still firm enough it probably would’ve been easier to eat it with chopsticks. The knife was hard, especially the fact that the small size and weight of the knife did not let it just rest on the bowl if I needed an extra hand on the steering wheel, I had to stab a chunk of ice cream first.

Don’t ask me what my technique is, I have no clue. My body will do whatever it can to accommodate food regardless of what I am currently doing! Of course, being firm meant it was still fairly cold and my stomach wasn’t too happy that I was trying to freeze it to death so I had to grab a few fries and pop them in my mouth to add a little warmth. By the time I went under the High Five, I was victorious in finishing my ice cream! I laid them down and made quick work on the rest of my meal. I like Chick-Fil-A and all, but sometimes…I come across the strangest people working there. Maybe I’ll bring up my fine in Allen some day, or maybe not. Oh well…figured I’d amuse you all.

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